Provenance

Sam: Burning the painting didn't get rid of it.

Dean: Yeah, thank you Captain Obvious!

Asylum

Dean: (talking about his dad) You know I love the guy, but I swear he writes like freaking Yoda!

 Red Sky at Morning

Bela: Do you really think this is going to work?

Dean: Almost definitely not.

Bad Day at Black Rock 

Bela: So, how'd things go last night with Peter?

(Sam gives angry look) 

Bela: That well, huh.

Dean: If you say "I told you so," I swear to God, I'll start swinging.

Red Sky at Morning 

Dean: (about Bela) You know what? Your right. I’m not going to kill her. I think slow torture’s the way to go.

Red Sky at Morning 

Dean: (to Sam) You stink like sex.

Red Sky at Morning 

(about Bela)

Dean: Can I shoot her? 

Sam: Not in public.

Bedtime Stories 

Sam: I think it's Snow White

Dean: Snow White? Ah, I saw that movie. Oh, the porn version anyway.

Hookman 

(to Sammy about his girly coffee choice)

Dean: Your half-caf, double vanilla latte is getting cold over here, Francis.

What Is and What Should Never Be 

(Sam has just told Dean they don't get along)

Dean: We don't? Well, we should. You're my brother. 

Sam: You're my brother.

Dean: Yeah! 

Sam: You know, that's what you said when you snaked my ATM card, or when you bailed on my graduation, or when you hooked up with Rachel Nayv.

Dean: Who? 

Sam: Uh, my prom date. On prom night.

Dean: *under his breath* Yeah, that does kinda sound like me.

Croatoan 

Sam: This is the dumbest thing you've ever done.

Dean: I don't know about that. Remember that waitress in Tampa ?

Folsom Prison Blues 

Henricksen: You think you're funny?

Dean: I think I'm adorable.

Playthings

Dean: Ya know she could be faking.

Sam:Yeah, what do you wanna do, poke her with a stick?

(Dean nods)

Sam: Dude, you're not gonna poke her with a stick!

Fresh Blood 

Dean : What do you want me to do, Sam, huh? Sit around all day writing sad poems about how I’m going to die? You know what, I’ve got one. Let’s see, what rhymes with "Shut up, Sam"?

A Very Supernatural Christmas 

Dean : You fudging touch me again, I'll fudging kill you!

Scarecrow 

(to the townspeople who are about to sacrifice him for their farms)

Dean: I hope your apple pie is freakin' worth it!

Playthings 

Dean: We might even run into Fred and Daphnie inside. Mmmm... Daphnie. I love her.

Hunted 

Dean: Come on man. I know Sam, OK? Better than anyone. He's got more of a conscience than I do. I mean the guy feels guilty searching the Internet for porn.

Faith 

Dean: I'm not gonna die in a hospital where the nurses aren't even hot.

Crossroads Blues 

Dean: We know a little about a lot of things; just enough to make us dangerous.

Nightshifter 

Dean: Damn cops.

Sam: They were just doing their job. 

Dean: No, they were doing our job, only they don't know it so they suck at it

Nightshifter 

Dean: I like him. He says okie dokie.

Nightmare 

Dean: As long as I'm around, nothing bad is gonna happen to you.

Dead in the Water

Sam: Kids are the best?

Dean: Yeah, I love kids. 

Sam: Name three children that you even know.

(Dean scratches head for while; Sam starts to walk away) 

Dean: I'm thinking!

Skin 

(about the shapeshifter)

Dean: Ugh, the thought of him driving my car. 

Sam: Oh, c'mon.

Dean: It's killing me!

Faith 

Dean: Man, you're a lying bastard! I thought you said we were going to see a doctor.

Sam: I believe I said specialist. Look, Dean, this guy is supposed to be the real deal.

Dean: I can't believe you brought me here to see some guy who heals people out of a tent!

Faith 

Dean: You better take care of that car. Or, I swear, I'll haunt your ass.

Sam: I don't think that's funny.

Dean: Oh come on, it's a little funny.

Houses of the Holy 

Sam: Dean, there's ten times as much lore about angels as there is about anything else we've ever hunted.

Dean: You know what, there's a ton of lore on unicorns too. In fact, I hear that they ride on silver moonbeams, and that they shoot rainbows out of their ass!

Sam: (looking heartbroken) Wait, there's no such thing as unicorns?

Dean: (looks concerned for a moment, then catches on) Cute.

Playthings

Dean: Of course, the most troubling question is, why do these people assume we're gay?

Croatoan 

(an infected townsperson tells Dean to get out of his car)

Dean:Heh. Well, you are a handsome devil, but I don't swing that way. Sorry.

Crossroad Blues

Dean: The secretary's name is Carly. She's 23, she kayaks, and they're real.

Sam: You didn't happen to ask her if she's seen any black dogs lately, did you?

(Dean hands over a list)

Dean: Every complaint called in this week about anything big, black or doglike. There's 19 calls in all. And, uh, I don't know what this is.

(hands Sam a post-it note; Sam laughs)

Sam: You mean Carly's MySpace address?

Dean: Yeah, MySpace, what the hell is that?

(Sam laughs again, a little incredulous)

Dean: Seriously, is that like some sort of porn site?

The Kids Are Alright

Sam: So let me get this straight. You want to drive all the way to Cicero just to hook up with some random chick?

Dean: She was a yoga teacher. That was the bendiest weekend of my life!

Bad Day at Black Rock 

Dean: (reading from trophy) 1995.

Sam: No way. That's my Division Championship soccer trophy. I can't believe he kept this. 

Dean: Probably the closest you ever got to being a boy.

Sin City 

Dean: (about the Colt) So if we wanna go check out these omens in Ohio, think you can have that thing ready by this afternoon?

Bobby: Well, it won’t kill demons by then, but I can promise it’ll kill you.

Bedtime Stories 

Sam: I've got a theory. Sort of.

Dean: Hit me.

Sam: Well, thinking about fairy tales.

Dean: Oh, that’s... that's nice. You think about fairy tales often?

Bedtime Stories 

Sam: (staring at frog on the road) Yeah, you’re right, that's completely normal.

Dean: All right, maybe it is fairy tales. Totally messed-up fairy tales. I'll tell you one thing, there’s no way I'm kissing a damned frog.

Bedtime Stories 

Sam: (gesturing to pumpkin on porch) Hey, check that out.

Dean: Yeah? It's close to Halloween. 

Sam: You remember Cinderella? The pumpkin that turns into a coach and the mice that become horses?

Dean: Dude! Could you be more gay? Don't answer that.

Bedtime Stories 

Dean: You find a way to stop Callie, all right.

Sam: What about you?

Dean: I'm gonna go stop the big bad wolf. Which is the weirdest thing I've ever said.

Red Sky At Morning

Dean: A Hand of Glory? I think I got one of those at the end of my Thai massage last week.

Red Sky At Morning

Bela: You know, when this is over, we should really have angry sex.

Dean: (after thinking hard) Don't objectify me.

Fresh Blood

Dixon: Can you think of a worse hell?

Dean: Well, there's Hell.

A Very Supernatural Christmas

Sam: Huh, when you sacrifice to Holnacar, guess what he gives you in return? 

Dean: Lap dances, hopefully.

A Very Supernatural Christmas 

Dean: She gave them to you for free? Do you sell them for free?

Shopkeeper: No way. It's Christmas. People pay a buttload for them. 

Dean: That's the spirit.

Malleus Maleficarum 

Dean: You saved my life.

Ruby: Don't mention it. 

Dean: What was that stuff? God, it was ass. It tasted like ass.

Ruby: It's witchcraft, short bus. (she leaves) 

Dean: (mutters) You're the short bus, short bus...

Malleus Maleficarum 

Dean: (to Ruby) You wanna kill me, get in the line b*tch!

Dream a Little Dream of Me 

Dean: Dude, you were making some serious happy noises. Who are you dreaming about? Angelina Jolie?

Sam: No... 

Dean: Brad Pitt?

Sam: No. No!

Mystery Spot

Dean being mimicked by Sam: You think your being funny but your being really really childish... Sam Winchester wears make-up... Sam Winchester cries his way through sex... Sam Winchester keeps a ruler by his bed and every morning when he wakes up he... OK ENOUGH!!

Jus in Bello

Dean: It's like we got a contract on us. You think it's 'cause we're so awesome? I think it's 'cause it's we're so awesome.

Jus in Bello

Henricksen: I shot the Sheriff.

Dean: (stares at the dead cop for a while) But you didn't shoot the deputy.

Jus in Bello

Sam: You were possessed. 

Henricksen: Possessed like... possessed?

Sam: That's what it feels like. Now you know 

Dean: I owe you the biggest "I told you so" ever.

Jus in Bello

Henricksen: I mean, after all, seeing you two in chains... 

Dean: You kinky son of a b*tch, we don't swing that way.

Jus in Bello 

Dean: Honestly, I think the world's going to end bloody. But it doesn't mean we shouldn't fight. We do have choices. I choose to go down swingin'.

Jus in Bello 

Henricksen: You know what my job is?

Dean: You mean, besides locking up the good guys?

Malleus Maleficarum 

Dean: I hate witches! Spewing their bodily fluids everywhere. It is insane! No, downright unsanitary!

Devil's Trap

Meg: He begged for his life with tears in his eyes. He begged to see his sons one last time. That's when I slit his throat! 

Dean: For your sake, I hope your lying. 'Cause if it's true I swear to God I will march into hell myself, and I will slaughter each and every one of you evil sons of b*tches, so help me God!

Devil's Trap 

Dean: Where's our father, Meg?

Meg: You didn't ask very nicely. 

Dean: Where's our father, b*tch!

Meg: Do you kiss you mother with that mouth? Oh, I forget... You don't!

The Kids Are Alright 

Dean (to Sam): Gumby girl.... Does that make me Pokey?

LAZARUS RISING

Four months after being dragged to Hell by Lilith's minions, Dean inexplicably wakes up, buried underground in a coffin. He escapes his underground confinement and tries to contact Bobby, when he's suddenly ambushed by an unknown entity. He is reunited with Sam, who is just as surprised at Dean's resurrection as he himself. Together with Bobby, the Winchester brothers find a psychic, Pamela Barnes, to help them discover what pulled Dean out of Hell. Pamela does find out the name of the being, Castiel, but at a horrible price—the sight of Castiel burns her eyes out. It is also revealed that Sam's psychic abilities have advanced greatly as he now is able to exorcise demons. He also seems to be frequently meeting with Ruby, who has possessed a new host. Sick of being toyed with, Dean decides to summon the thing together with Bobby in order to find out what it wants and prepares a ritual. The ritual succeeds and Castiel appears, an angel of the Lord. He explains that he is responsible for dragging Dean out of Hell and, when Dean asks why he of all people would be worthy of being saved, that God has work for him to do. 

ARE YOU THERE, GOD? IT'S ME, DEAN WINCHESTER

Bobby asks the Winchester boys for help when fellow hunters of his are being killed off one by one in a most gruesome way. Sam is haunted by FBI Agent Henrickson who died in the explosion caused by Lilith, accusing Sam of failing him. Together with Bobby they find out that they're being haunted by the spirits of the people they couldn't save, which is called "The Rising of the Witnesses", a sign of the upcoming Apocalypse. Meg Masters (Nicki Aycox) and two twin girls also appear and haunt Dean, Sam and Bobby, who perform a ritual to ward off the angry spirits. Later, Castiel appears to Dean in a dream and reveals that "The Rising of the Witnesses" is one of many seals, which are being broken by demons in order to bring on the Apocalypse, in which Lucifer will walk the earth. 

IN THE BEGINING

Dean is transported back in time to the '70s in Lawrence, Kansas. There, he meets a younger John Winchester (Matt Cohen) and Mary (Amy Gumenick). This family reunion gets bigger when the Dean meets their Grandfather (Mitch Pileggi), who could have a huge secret. 

 METAMORPHOSIS

After watching Sam harness his powers, Dean angrily confronts him. Distance and tension is put between the two brothers as Dean realizes his younger brother is manifesting the demonic blood inside him with Ruby's help, and lying to him about it. Meanwhile, a hunter asks Sam and Dean for help in a case involving a man who is going through a metamorphosis into a monstrous creature that consumes human flesh. 

 MONSTER MOVIE

The Winchester Brothers find themselves at a local Oktoberfest celebration investigating a series of suspicious murders being perpetrated by what locals are describing as monsters from classic 1930's horror movies. They soon discover this is the work of yet another Shapeshifter (portrayed by Todd Stashwick). 

 YELLOW FEVER

The boys are lured into a town where a man died of a heart attack, but with none of the usual symptoms. The man died of a ghost sickness which is passed onto Dean. The illness causes a person to experience general anxiety, which progresses into deadly fear. Sam and Bobby must find a way to save Dean before his heart stops. The original title for this episode was 'Phobia'. Also, before the credits, there is a special surprise for the fans: an outtake of Jensen Ackles improvisationally air guitaring his way through 'Eye of the Tiger'. 

 IT'S THE GREAT PUMPKIN, SAM WINCHESTER

It's a few days before Halloween and Sam and Dean investigate two mysterious deaths in a small town. The brothers find hex bags and deduce a witch is sacrificing people to summon a dangerous demon named Samhain. Castiel arrives in town and tells Sam and Dean the freeing of Samhain is one of the seals that will lead to freeing Lucifer. Castiel brings a specialist angel named Uriel to smite the entire town. 

 WISHFUL THINKING

Sam and Dean investigate a small town where the wishing well really works. A teddy bear comes to life, someone wins the lottery and the town geek gets a hot girlfriend. The brothers realize that while everyone is happy now, the end result will be disastrous. 

 I KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST SUMMER

Ruby heard some demons whisper about a girl in the psychiatric hospital who suddenly became a target for demons, and points Sam and Dean in the direction to protect Anna Milton before Hell gets their hooks into her. After a close encounter with a dangerous demon powerhouse, Alastair, whom Dean remembers from Hell, Sam reveals what happened to him in the months without Dean. Castiel and Uriel appear and the Winchesters realize it has become a fight between Heaven and Hell for the girl. (Part 1 of 2) 

 HEAVEN AND HELL

Dean and Sam figure out why Castiel and his superior/handler, Uriel, the Archangel of Purity, want Anna Milton dead when the three of them are forced to go on the run, not only from heavenly and vengeful angels, but from Alastair and his demon minions who also try to track down Sam, Dean and Anna. (Part 2 of 2) 

 FAMILY REMAINS

Sam and Dean investigate a suspected haunted house with a murderous spirit inside the walls. Complications ensue when a family of five moves in, and the "spirit" turns out to be two very non-supernatural, feral children who are the product of incest and years of abuse, and who are willing to kill to protect their home. 

 CRISS ANGEL IS A DOUCHEBAG

Sam and Dean attend a magician's convention where it seems that real magic is being performed. However, while performing magic, a magician performs execution on himself, but he did not get killed whereas a man dies after being impaled by the spikes in his stage. Has someone turned to the dark arts to revive their failing career? Also, Ruby visits Sam with a proposition. 

 AFTER SCHOOL SPECIAL

Sam and Dean discover that a spirit is haunting one of their old high schools. While investigating the haunting Dean and Sam relive their high school experiences through flashbacks. The spirits are actually nerds who are tormented by jocks, so they want revenge on them. 

 SEX AND VIOLANCE

The brothers investigate murders committed by men under the spell of a siren, and meet a doctor who takes a liking to Sam. They also meet a detective who first questions Sam and Dean, and then helps them. Then the brothers fall under the spell themselves. 

 DEATH TAKES A HOLIDAY

The brothers investigate a town where no one dies because the Reapers are being trapped. With no one left to guide the souls to the afterlife, people survive fatal gunshots, stabbing wounds, etc. Sam and Dean learn that Alastair plans to break one of the 66 seals by killing Reapers and seek the help of psychic Pamela to stop his malicious plan. But things go wrong when Pamela gets hurt. 

 ON THE HEAD OF A PIN

Castiel and Uriel have captured Alastair and ask Dean to use the torturing skills he learned in Hell to extract information from him so they can stop whomever is killing angels. Sam is concerned Dean can’t handle the job but Dean agrees to do it. However, when Alastair reveals some shocking information, Dean’s world is shattered. Sam ends up getting Alastair to reveal the demon who is murdering the angels by using his powers. Also, new information is revealed about the angels. 

 IT'S A TERRIBLE LIFE

Dean has gone missing and finds himself in an alternate reality in which he is a Wall Street Tycoon surrounded by a haunting that is forcing his co-workers to kill themselves. 

 THE MONSTER AT THE END OF THIS BOOK

 Lilith possesses the body of a dental hygienist and returns to wreak havoc and trouble on the Winchesters. Sam and Dean also discover a book entitled Supernatural about two demon hunting brothers named Sam and Dean Winchester while investigating a possible haunting at a comic book shop - the shop clerk believes the boys are LARPing the book when they visit. The author of the book turns out to be a prophet.

 JUMP THE SHARK

A 19-year-old boy named Adam calls Sam and Dean looking for John Winchester, claiming to be his son. Dean and Sam meet Adam, assuming he's a demon trying to lure then into a trap. However, they find out that John was indeed the boy's father and Adam tells them of his "normal" upbringing, which infuriates Dean. 

 THE RAPTURE

Castiel appears to Dean in a dream and says he has something important to tell him but they need to meet somewhere private. Dean and Sam go searching for Castiel but instead find Jimmy, Castiel’s human vessel, who has only a spotty recollection of being an angel. Jimmy wants to return to his family and normal life, but Dean and Sam are concerned about his safety. 

 WHEN THE LEVEE BREAKS

Dean and Bobby lock Sam in Bobby’s panic room so he can detox from the demon blood. However, as Bobby sees more seals are being broken he tells Dean they should let Sam out to help them fight the impending Apocalypse. Dean disagrees and goes to Castiel for help. Sam and Dean have a big blowout confrontation. 

 LUCIFER RISING

After leaving Dean, Sam joins Ruby on a final run to kill Lilith. They kidnap Lilith's personal chef who disguises itself as a nurse, stealing newborn babies for Lilith to devour, to question her. Meanwhile, Dean is kidnapped by the angels and brought to a room without any exit where Zachariah explains to him that the angels are not trying to stop the final seal from being broken—in fact, they want to start the Apocalypse, for it will cleanse the earth and bring Paradise. So Dean's task is not stopping the Apocalypse from starting, but ending it once it has. Dean is furious at Castiel for deceiving him, and Castiel reluctantly reveals that Lilith's death will break the final seal and sends Dean to St. Mary's Convent where Sam is just using his powers to kill Lilith. Ruby sees Dean approaching and closes the door telepathically so Dean can't stop Sam. After Sam has killed Lilith, her blood forms some sort of portal on the ground while Ruby reveals that she has been working for Lucifer the entire time, and the only demon who knew of her true allegiance was Lilith. She manipulated Sam into killing Lilith because she knew that Lilith was the final seal. Sam is devastated when he realizes what he has done. Suddenly, Dean smashes the door and stabs Ruby with her own knife, killing her for good, as the door to Lucifer's prison begins to open.